HeeeLLLooooooO

Wow!

Soo many things happen to me this month.
I have been starting my practicum for ~2 weeks, and I have complicated feeling in regard to the works I am going to perform for the next 8 mths.
I am still in the process of adjusting myself, and I believe that I will see BIG things out there... something nice in my agency, and I enjoy meeting the kids. The saddest thing is that the location is far away from Oakland area. It takes ~1.5 hrs trip from Oakland to my agency, so total hours for round trips will be 3 hours.

Another flip side from my practicum is that I have to accomodate my times very effectively and efficiently. My academic workloads combine with my practicum works make my days a little bit tough...

However, I do have good news...
I saw pretty fireworks last night...
I also enjoyed my times with oppa.

HeLL

Midterm is around the corner, and that means everyone is starting to get panic including me. On the other hand, I question myself if I am really in a panic mode, or I just pretend that I am panic.
Perhaps, I should say that I just want to get over these daunting midterms.

Some of my close classmates are really stressed out, even though I know deep down they will get at least A- for each midterm exam. They have been studying since two weeks ago. Some even studied in a library all days all weeks. Therefore, they should not worry for midterms. right???
Unfortunately, this is not the case because they keep saying "I don't understand this and that." I admit that I admire their efforts to email our professors just to get the answers. However, I also wonder whether the professors will get tired or not in responding their questions because they asked too much questions, which I believed they could find some of the answers from textbooks.
I am so tired.. emotionally tired, so I just pray that I can survive until Thanksgiving break. The practicum will start soon, so I am not allowed to get sick..

I also don't know why I feel sad lately.. I have lots of things going on, and I don't know which one that I should do first... How I wish that I have someone other than my mom to talk with. Mom has enough problem, so I should not bother her, and I can't rely on my sister, too. I am just tired. That's it.

Idul Fitri

Eid Mubarak... I guess that the English words for Idul Fitri.

midterm is next week
Field practicum will start two weeks from now

Mixed

Sometimes I feel that people come to me because they need my helps
but
they will leave me, once their problems are solved.
Sometimes
I want to know everything about my friends, what they discuss, and what they think
but
I know that everyone deserves a privacy, which means he/she wants to keep it for him/herself.
Sometimes
I wonder if there is anyone out there besides my parents who always think about me all the time
but
I know it is useless and bring no good for having that thought.

At the end,
I should always have a positive thinking.
I should not be too sensitive to my friends and everything in my surroundings.
I should believe that there is a good thing, a big surprise that is waiting for me.
I know I will get there
and I understand that it is okay, if you suddenly just feel terrible about yourself.
I thank God for His guidance and protection because I can't imagine what my life look like without Him.

Untitled

So many things happened to me this week. Some of them are good, some are not okay.
The good news:
my high school friend gave birth a baby girl on Thursday morning.
one of my undergraduate friends were married last week or at the second week of September.
I did a volunteer interview and tried to make this for my field practicum w/ additional works (of course). I got a sense that they seemed to like me, but they won't say anything until they receive all references back to their office.
I will do another placement interview next Wednesday. I am not sure if I like it, but I've got to try..
I will do a "speedy" volunteer this coming Monday so that I can write my paper.
Today is Friday, I can relax a little bit.

Not-so-good news:
I still stuck with the diversity quiz... Not sure, how I can get back on track
I am really OVERWHELMED with all the graduate school works... It makes me think that I will not continue to PhD. No, thanks.
And many more...

Another thing that I want to share is a story of my classmate. We have same classes except on Monday. Both of us are international students and come from Asia.The differences: I am a female and my classmate is a male. He is from Korea and I am from Indo. He actually lives in Seoul and has social work degree from a univ in Korea.
One day he said that he used all his salaries that he has saved for ~3 yrs from his navy job to go to graduate school. His story really stuck in my head for some reason..
I am sure other people do the same thing, but this is the first time I hear a "Live" story from a "real" person. Not only I am amazed w/ his spirit, but I also respect him. It makes me think that I shouldn't give up with my situation, that I should keep moving on. Probably this is why I don't like to see people whose hobby is to waste money, but no effort to produce money or show something good.

Roller coaster weekend

Friday:
The Original Mattress Factory Museum
Panera
Phipps Conservatory

Saturday:
Lunch at CMU truck
Run errands

Sunday:
church
Lunch at Belgian restaurant..
another run errand...
Study

When????

When will my placement get confirmed??
I still can't get hold on her... I wonder how busy she is until she even can't respond my calls.